Pokus Froi Dencio 08:13

        Binilang ako ang oras na ginugugol ko sa mga social networking sites sa isang araw at lumalabas na halos anim na oras at tatlumpung minuto akong nakatanga at nagpapaka-stress sa mga nakikita ko sa laptop at sa cellphone sa buong maghapon.

*****

            Dahil alam ko naman na walang kahihinatnan ang mga pinagagagawa ko, minabuti ko na lang na mag-OC mode simula Abril uno. Nilinis ko ang kwarto ko, tinapon ang mga basurang dalawang linggo nang hindi nagagalaw at nag-ayos ng mga gamit. Tinago ko rin si lappy, nilalabas lang kung kailangan at sinimulan na ang puspusang workout. Kailangan na talagang magtino. Para sa bayan. Para sa ekonomiya.

*****

          Four percent fluent na daw ako sa Spanish sabi ng Duolingo, isang language learning app. Mga ilang linggo na rin simula nang ginamit ko ito, at nakakatulong nga naman sa pag-improve ng bokabularyo. Kailangan ko na rin talagang magseryoso sa pag aaral ng Espanyol, dahil kung hindi, hindi ko makakausap ng matino ang mga naging kaibigan ko sa Livemocha. Nakakalungkot lang dahil isa-shutdown na daw ito sa 22.

*****

          Gumawa na ako ng schedule ng mga aktibidades at mga kailangang tapusin para makumpleto na ang mga requirements ko para sa plano kong pagkuha ng license examination sa susunod na taon. Andame ko nang nasasayang na oras sa barko, at kailangan na talagang magpokus para matapos ang mga iyon.

*****

           Naglakas-loob ako na i-message si crush. Kaso seen daw sabi ni Facebook. Ok lang. Mukhang ayaw nya naman ng sustento buwan-buwan. De, joke lang.hehehe

*****

           Anim na taon na pala akong wala sa isang seryosong relasyon. Magiging halaman na kaya ako?

*****

         Pakiramdam ko naadik na ako sa kakapanood ng mga malalaswang pelikula. Dahil ba sa walang magawa, o dahil sa hormones? Basta alam ko hindi maganda ang nagiging epekto. Naapektuhan ang mental processes ko. At nakakaramdam ako ng panlulumo. 

Random sa Bisperas ng Balentayns Froi Dencio 01:35

Excited na ako sa magiging luto sa ampalaya bukas!

         Valentine's na bukas pero nasa barko pa rin ako. Naalala ko nang nakaraang taon, nakapunta ako ng Dangwa para mamili ng bulaklak. Nang pauwi na (sa Fairview) medyo malayo nilakad ko at nakipambuno pa sa pagsakay sa bus. Nakarating naman ng di masyadong lamog ang mga bulaklak sa mga pagbibigyan. Doon ko na-realize na pwede pala akong maging delivery boy.

******

         Valentine's na bukas. Sabi ni second cook magluluto daw siya ng ampalaya. Iniisip ko naman kung anong magandang luto sa ampalaya. Yung usual na me itlog ba o ihahalo lang sa pinakbet? Wish ko lang na 'wag niyang kilawin ang ampalaya bukas.

******

         Valentine's na bukas. Pero ngayon pa lang andame nang PBB teens sa FB. Post ng mga bulaklak. Mga hart hart kuno. Mga pumuporeber. Bakit ba kasi nagiging overrated na ang February 14?!

******

         Nitong nakaraang araw me nakita akong post na picture ng "boypren" di umano ng sis ko. Naka-tag kay sis, me nakalagay na "Happy 5th Monthsary Mahal Koh." Yes, may "h" ampotek. Nag init mukha ko at nag-comment lang ng "Edi waw!" saka me emoji ng kamao at bungo.

******

         Dahil dun nakapagpost pa ako ng ganito sa wall ko: "Sa galit ko ngayon makakagawa ako ng atomic bomb mula sa tiniktik na kalawang. Tapos lalagyan ko ng ribbon. Then send ko senyo sa Valentine's."

******

         Sa kabila ng nag-aalab na damdamin nitong nakaraan, nakakatuwa rin dahil nakatanggap ako ng magandang balita. Approved na ang promotion ko. Yay!

******

         Valentine's na bukas pero nasa kwarto lang siguro ako ng buong maghapon. Magmo-movie marathon siguro o matutulog lang. O magpe-pretend lang  na ako ay isang bubuyog na nasa bingit na ng insanity dahil walang makitang bulaklak sa paligid.



Photo: Google Images

8 Things That I Always Look Forward To When Returning Home Froi Dencio 01:41

         Being a seafarer means being away from home for months. And that being said, seafarers always look forward to returning home for vacation. They might get excited to see their families and friends. They might be looking forward to their ongoing projects or things they allot their hard-earned money to. Or, maybe they might just be hoping to spend their vacation at home or someplace that will relieve their mind and body of any stress from those long contracts at sea.

          As for me, there are few things that I always look forward to in our small town prior to my vacation. Though it is situated on the southernmost tip of Sorsogon (with the nearby town of Matnog), our town, Sta. Magdalena has a lot to offer and is worthy of being called a hidden paradise.

1. The Simple Way of Life. If not for the numerous training and processing of documents during vacation, I would rather choose to stay at home, take a nap under the mango tree and listen to the sounds of nature. Still, even though I have to spend some time in the city, I always see to it that I have time to be at our small hut by the rice fields. 

2. The Local Delicacies. Being on vacation enables you to taste your childhood favorite foods again and again. Since foods that are being cooked on board is only limited to the available provisions and the skill of the cook, I always tell my mother to prepare some local snacks like hinagom, muron, binot-ong, and putong kamoteng-kahoy when I am at home. In addition to that, I enjoy honing my cooking skills again by preparing local dishes like laing or pinangat, kinagang and linunti na pili.

3. The Beaches. Yes. Beaches. You may ask why look forward to beaches when you spend a lot of time at sea? Of course, because beaches offer both leisure and relaxation, something that you cannot attained by jumping off a pool of seawater on a ship. 

4. Chilies! I like spicy foods and labuyo (local red pepper) never fails to satiate my longing for spiciness. Even if food on board offers a variety of spicy foods, nothing can still compare to foods at home seasoned with labuyo.

5. Waterfalls. Our small town is blessed with waterfalls concealed within the forest canopy. During my childhood years, I would venture deep into the forest, tracing the rivers and finding hidden waterfalls. When I grew older, my urge to do waterfall hunting still drives me do some trekking, with my barkadas at home this time.

6. Gamefowls. No, don't get me wrong. I do not get myself involve in raising fowls for cockfight purposes when on vacation. Though we have few  roosters at home, I only look forward to them doing the Tiktilaok! wake-up call.

7.  Books. I may not be endowed with riches but I considered them my prized possessions. With today's digital age, paper books seemed to be outdated but for me, the feeling of touching and scanning through pages of a paper book is definitely irreplaceable. I have two medium size boxes full of books and I always check on them every time I get home for vacation.

8. Last but not the least, Quality Time With The Family. Being a seafarer also means being unable to be with your family on important events and occasions. Hence, during the short period of time that I will be spending my vacation with my family, I make sure that we have a quality time together, be it out of the town or just a small salu-salo at home. Most of the time, when I am on board, I would think of the places where our family can enjoy and have meaningful bonding moments together when I return home.

         Now you see, those things I mentioned above are the ones that make me look forward to returning to our small town. There really is, no place like home. How about you? What are the things that you look forward to when returning home?

Stack of books photo: Google Images

Looking Back and Moving Forward Froi Dencio 01:43

I summon all the forces of the Universe! Be great 2016!
(Nung minsang gumala ako sa Kublai Art Garden.)

Travel. Work. Land. Sea.

Four words to sum up my 2015. Last year may not be as exciting as the previous years for me but it was, unique in its own way. I was able to travel as far as Mindanao, worked with the best people I have met so far, strengthened bonds with friends both online and offline, and spent quality time with my family despite the limited number of vacation days on land. However, my life last year was not always at the zenith.

I spent most of my time at sea, where I experienced the lowest point in my life so far.

I reflected on life and attempted to make a sudden change.

I procrastinated time and time again and regretted the outcomes afterward.

I still went to the alternate universe I had created and sinned.

2015, I guess, made me realize that I have to take a closer look to my actions. It made me rethink about what I want to do with my life. That I need to change my way of doing things, start looking at the world in a new perspective and live life to the fullest. That I need to learn as much as I can and make good use of knowledge to make sound decisions.

Last year may already be in the past but it paved way for improvements in 2016. More than long list of resolutions, it made me think of things to look forward to this year:

Continue reading non-fictions.

Collect books on religion, history, maritime and language.

Strengthen my relationship with God.

Meaningful travels with people who matter.

Live, Love and Laugh.

Five Things To Do When Boredom Strikes On Board Froi Dencio 00:27

          Boredom happens to anyone. It's a fact. No matter who or wherever you are, there will always be a time that you don't actually have anything to do (aside from breathing). Or you get tired of doing things over and over again. 

          When you are working on board a vessel, boredom is quite worse than when you are working on land. Imagine floating in the middle of the sea seeing nothing but water and clouds for days. Imagine talking to the same person and hearing the same stories for six or nine months. Imagine people watching the same movies again and again that you can already recite the script of the characters. Imagine eating the same food for weeks. 

           Things like that will continue to pester your very existence and then you'll arrive to the point when you can say that sea life is boring. That your job sucks. And eventually, that you are losing your mind and a little more things will turn you insane.

            Of course you will go nuts if you keep on thinking on how boring it is to be a seafarer. Therefore, you have to find a way to make your life for few months at sea a little bit exciting, or if not, less boring. There are books that you can read, games that you can play and areas where you can do some workout. You can also do some music jam (most of the ships have band set) or belt "My Way" to your heart's content without fearing for your life.

           Most of all, there is the Internet (thanks to the technological advancements in seafaring). You can browse, chat, share pictures, post videos, send message, among others. Some ships have strong internet connections that you can even make video calls to your friends or family at home. Sadly, younger generation of seafarers nowadays prefer to stay inside their cabin and face their laptops most of the time than to interact with other crew members.

            Anyway, I already mentioned several things that you can do on board to make your time worthwhile. If those things are not enough, you can do the following when boredom strikes:

             1. Take a selfie, duofie or groufie. Let's face it. It's fun posing for the camera. You might project a serious face, a wacky one or both, but you enjoy the idea of taking pictures of yourself. You may get tired of your crew mate's faces but keeping some photos with them will make you remember your days together and will  provide some crazy throwbacks in the future.

Duofie pa more!

Alamin kung sino ang original bearer ng "The Mole"

             2. Organize a pool party. Make sure to get the approval of higher officers especially the Captain if you are going to organize a pool party. You can also ask the galley department to prepare some drinks/foods. If approved, take off your clothes and dive. Anyways this is applicable to ships with small swimming pools. Don't ever dive if there is none. Ano yun adik lang?

              3. Grow an indoor plant. For those who love plants, you can try your luck growing a small plant inside your cabin as long as it is not an endangered species, something that brings disease or a coconut. 

Dati tatlo lang ang dahon ni Panfilo. Ngayon siyam na!

             4. Encourage your crew mates to show their talents and make impromptu shows from time to time. 

             5. Make a music video. If you come across the latest dance craze or trending songs, why not make an MV or record yourself while lip syncing? Below is our version of Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae) by Silento.  Note: No animal was hurt during the shooting process nor any international law was violated.

          I only mentioned five here but there will always be a thousand ways to do when you feel that boredom is engulfing most of your head. All you need to have is a part of humor, a part of resourcefulness, a part of pakikisama and a perspective of positivism that is innately a Filipino trait that makes us smile despite the odds converging against us. So boredom? Bring it on! I definitely have a lot of tricks  to counter you. :)

Marino Diaries Froi Dencio 00:07

 People may never understand his plight, but one thing is for sure: he always got a friend in me.

Unlabeled
By S.E.

          I've been working as a seaman for some time now. From time to time I have to deal with my crew mate's attitude towards me. I have to conform to the standards that may not be written but implied by the industry whose patriarchal complex and machismo is at large. Like most people who struggle in their workplaces trying to be themselves, trying to avoid discrimination, mine is of no exception. Let me share my story, a story of personal journey to self-acceptance in a world where the definition of the word acceptance is elusive.

           I remember when I was still a kid. I was innocent and carefree. All I wanted to do was play and have fun, until I grew up and the world introduced me into their set of rules. Boys are supposed to do this and girls are supposed to do that. If you won’t conform to the society’s expectations then you will be labelled like an object and be a subject to never-ending insults, making you beg for what is supposed to be given free to everyone-LOVE.

           Sometimes I ask God why He allowed me to be like this. Why do I have to see the world differently? Why would His creations hate me and tell me that I am nothing but garbage in the society, a disease. Does God really despise me? Am I not His son? Have I really been sent by Lucifer to lead mankind’s extinction? These perceptions are the very same barriers that hold me down. I am a prisoner of sexist ideology, tied to the ground their stereotypical judgments.

           For a guy who’s always been in constant struggle in finding affection and acceptance, life is not easy. While I’m up fighting an endless battle I’ve always had for more than half of my life, people around me will never cease to enjoy ideas regarding sexuality in which they have declared themselves masters at. Little do they know that it’s more than a What-you-see-is-what-you-get situation. Sexuality is a complicated puzzle. Being a hard one to decipher, in some cases, it had lead for some to question self-worth and their existence. It had even claimed lives because of the society’s pretentious idea of righteousness and godliness.

           The only way of moving forward is by suppressing every thought and emotion, practically everything about my genuine identity. I admit I would want myself to break free from the barriers that have been holding me, but I am afraid of the things that would come after. I am afraid that I would turn out to be the same generic gay guy the society had stereotyped. I am afraid how the world is going to receive me, and of course my family, whom I have always lived for. Will all my efforts of trying to be a good son and a brother go to waste? Will they still see me as the same person they have shared home with? Will I all of a sudden be a stranger to them?

            Self–acceptance is freedom or so they say. But being under the scrutinizing eyes of the people who refuse to understand how it is being on my shoes don’t seem to make that valid at all. I am torn between what I feel is right and what the society imposes to be the only way of living. I don’t see the significance of choices and living one’s own life.

           From then on, freedom is out of reach, but now as I think of it, I am not the problem. I was never the problem but the world is, blinded by too much light shed on it, failing to see the person that I really am. The guy who wants to succeed in his life and be capable of giving his parents the life they’ve always wanted to give their children but couldn’t. The guy who laughs at silly things and cries when his soul is beaten down. The guy who wants to find someone whom he will spend his life with. Have kids and a home. Go to the mall. Eat at ice cream shops. Watch sunsets. I want to be with someone I know I am going to be happy with and that is not a bad thing because to love was and will never be wrong for God is Love.

           All I have ever done was love and that is the only thing that I deeply needed. But why is it that all I ever receive is hate? I have never harmed anyone. I have always been silent, tried to be somebody whom nobody cares about. I have always been avoiding attention but when they do realize my presence, it will be the start of my never ending struggle. Emotional and mental abuse can lead me to self-destruction. But I won’t let it be my end. I just couldn’t.

           God is love, I remembered and all of a sudden I am awake. God is love. I keep on repeating it to myself like a long forgotten mantra.

         I am all that and gender will never dictate my relevance in this world. I will never fear destructive comments from people who don’t know a single thing about my personality for I am not a bad person. I will never seek revenge to those who did me wrong for I am better than that. No, I will never declare myself holy nor will I deny being a sinner. The world can judge but they can never destroy me because I have faith in God for I am His son. I will always remember that there is no evil in honesty and it shall never be called acceptance of fault. I am choosing happiness and freedom for the person that I genuinely am. Besides, I didn’t choose to be gay, I woke up like this.

Marino Diaries Froi Dencio 02:58

things are different when...

SEAMEN TALK ABOUT SEX
By J.S.

           I find it ironic and sometimes awkward that seamen, a general term to call men working at sea, is pronounced like semen. Coincidental or not, it seems to have some point. I had attended trainings last year to comply with the requirements of the industry. In almost every occasion, my instructor never failed to sneak in the topic about sex.

          In one of my courses, when it's three fifteen in the afternoon and everyone had gone for a coffee break, our instructor starts to tell his stories during his life on board. He narrates experiences with emphasis on how good he was in attracting prostitutes to have sex with him. He was teaching us his techniques and telling us what he does. The next day, he began telling his other sexual fantasies. On another day, he was telling us how he cheats on his wife and how he escapes confrontations about it. Until our last day, he had not failed to talk about sex.

          I always get disturbed by his stories and I begin to ask myself questions. Is this how men talk about women and sex? Couldn't he think of better ways to keep our attention besides talking about sex? I believe that a real man is more than what I have seen. A real man has a mature mind. Someone who can think clearly. Someone who will not deal with a prostitute to satisfy his flesh. Someone who will not be proud about cheating on his wife. A real man will not make other men do the same mistakes he committed. A real man is responsible for his actions. A real man will make every sacrifice just to keep his family.

          In my next training, I was hoping things would different but it didn’t get better. While many were falling asleep, our instructor started to talk about sex to pump up everyone’s attention. Stories about his sexual adventures from Brazil to Venezuela, to Netherlands and Russia, to Singapore and China and even in the Philippines; for every country and every port, he definitely had something to tell. From the stories of these selfish individuals, seafarers became stereotyped to have gone for sex to every race in every port in every country. I couldn’t put all the blame on them for committing this mistake but I am optimistic that it’s not too late to make things right.

          The last training I attended turned out to be different. I did get sleepy but there were no lame sexual stories in between topics. We talked about sex on our last day, but in a totally different perspective. Instead of telling how to win a woman for sex, our instructor discouraged us in bringing sex outside marriage. Sex is a gift of God to a man and a woman who are bound in marriage. It must be kept sacred for your wife alone.

         The nature of our work as seamen brings us closer to temptation. Long months away from home, from loved ones make us long for love and affection. Sex may give us a temporary satisfaction to the emptiness that we have, but it doesn't mean that we have to dwell in the idea so much to lead us into infidelity. Sex is not something we should keep unspoken of either. It is something to talk about with an open mind and holistic perspective. We just have to reveal the truths and expose the lies about it.

           So, shall we talk about sex?

Random: Sala sa Init at Lamig Froi Dencio 23:13

Ang gyro compass, bow.

           Mag-aapat na buwan na ako sa barko. Katulad ng dati kong ginagawa, magsisimula na akong magbilang ng natitirang araw ng pananatili ko sa dito. At dahil mas maikli na lang ang kontrata namin ngayon ( 6 months), makakauwi na ako sa katapusan ng Agosto kung sakali (yey!).  Medyo matagal na rin pala akong di nakakapagsulat ng maayos na post. Marami akong nasimulan pero di naman matapos. Andun lang sila sa drafts, naghihintay ng karugtong. At dahil wala naman kaming pasok ngayon, naisipan ko na lang na magrandom.

 *****

          Nadelay kami ng tatlong araw sa China dahil sa makapal na fog. Less than one nautical mile ang visibility kaya hindi kami makapasok ng Qingdao port. Yung fog siguro ang dahilan kung bakit yung mga fishermen nila eh napapadpad sa mga isla malapit sa Pilipinas. Tapos aangkinin nila. Anlabo mehn. Parang fog. Anlabo.

*****

Namumuo ang mga ulap sa malayo. Hindi namin alam na makapal pala na fog ang sasalubong sa amin.

         Pagkatapos namin ng discharging sa China eh agad naman kaming pumunta sa South Korea para sa bunkering (pagpapagasolina). Akala ko noon eh di naman matutuloy ang ilang naka-schedule na operations dahil na naman sa fog. Kinahapunan, nahawi naman iyon at sabay-sabay na nagsidatingan ang mga barge at service boat. Hindi magkamayaw ang lahat kung ano ang uunahin. Pero natapos naman iyon ng mga alas-dyes ng gabi at nakaalis kami ng Korea ng alas-sais ng umaga.

*****

          Nababadtrip ako sa sarili ko dahil nagsisimula na naman akong mag-procrastinate. Andami kong dapat gawin na hindi ko nabibigyan ng oras at madalas pinagpapaliban lang muna. Kahit na alam kong mas madami akong time na gawin iyon ngayon dito sa barko, di ko pa rin makuhang gawin. Nakakamiss tuloy ang mga study sessions namin ni Jan. Napapapursige ako. Sa ngayon sarili ko lang talaga ang kailangang magtulak sa akin.

*****

          Maraming nababadtrip sa bosun namin. Kabilang na ako. Pero di ako nagsasalita kung gaano ako kabadtrip sa kanya sa tuwing siya ang pulutan sa mga usapan. Not my thing. Nakakasawa kung puro si ganito si ganyan ang laman ng kwentuhan. Masyadong makatao.

*****

Nakakatuwang pagmasdan ang dagat. Parang salamin ng ulap. Naks!

          Kung gaano kalamig sa me Eastern Asia, grabe naman ang init malapit sa Equator. Kalmado naman ang dagat na parang nagiging salamin na ng mga ulap kung titingnan. Yun nga lang, ang iniiittt! Abot sing it!

*****

Bagong gupit. Selpi agad pagkatapos magbanlaw.

          Mag-aapat na buwan na rin pala akong hindi nakakapagpagupit, kaya kahapon, nagpagupit ako sa isa sa mga kasamahan ko. Pinabawasan ko lang ang gilid at tinira nya ang bandang tuktok. Voila! Undercut na daw. Konting haba pa at maitatali ko na ang buhok ko. Yung tipong Ariana Grande daw sa ponytail sabi ni Yccos.

*****

          Nagpa-contest pala ako sa mga kapwa ko marino. Tatlo lang ang nagpasa ngunit nakakatuwa naman ang pinagsusulat nila. Nagrequest pa ang isa na ipost ko daw dito ang mga iyon minsan. Bukas o sa makalawa, isa sa kanila ang makakatanggap ng $100. (yey!)

*****

 

Ang kalapati naming walang pangalan. Me kanin pa sa tuka.

          May alaga pala kaming kalapati ngayon sa barko. Apat silang galing Taiwan pero siya na lang ang huling natira sa kanila. Nakarating na siyang China, Korea at Papua New Guinea. Pero ayaw pang bumaba. Siguro dahil me melamine sa China, mers-cov sa S. Korea at malaria sa PNG. O dahil hinihintay pa rin niya ang pagbalik namin sa Taiwan. No one knows. No one knows.

*****

          Someone's creeping me out lately dito sa barko. Isa sa mga bagong kasamahan ko dito. He's giving me creepy stare at times. Subukan nya lang mang-assault, itatapon ko talaga siya sa dagat.

No, hindi siya yung tinutukoy ko. Me flashlight lang yan kaya ganyan.

           So far maayos naman ang lahat. Mas magaan ang mga trabaho ngayon dito kumpara sa dati kong barko. Ayun nga, naghihintay na lang ako ng ilang loading at discharging at uuwi na naman. Sana lang eh makapagbakasyon ako ng tatlo hanggang apat na buwan dahil bitin na bitin ang bakasyon ko nitong nakaraan (sabay katok sa kahoy).

Sofia Froi Dencio 02:49

“How much? Quanto?”

“Ciento cincuenta minimo, dos cientos maximo.”

“That's expensive huh! Couldn’t it get any less?”

“Que?”

“Uhm, no ciento cincuenta... how about cien? Then vamos?

“No, no. Ciento cincuenta minimo.”

“But that's already in euros! Entiendo Ingles? Habla Ingles?

“No. No intiendo, no habla. Pero siento cinquenta es bueno para ti. Es bueno para mi.”

“What? Yo no intiendo. Yo hablo y intiendo Español un poco. Can I just speak English here?”

“Que?”

Ngumiti siya. May sinabi pang ibang hindi ko maintindihan. Ngumiti na lang din ako, sinubukang magsalita ng Ingles. Walang pagbabago. Hindi niya ako maintindihan. Limitado lang din kasi ang salitang Espanyol na alam ko. Muli siyang nagsalita, itinuro ang madilim na pasilyong malayo sa kinauupuan naming dalawa. Habitación, iyon lang ang naiintindihan ko. Kwarto. Mukhang ipinapahiwatig niya sa akin na mas mabuti kung sa kwarto na lang kami mag-usap.

Natatawa ako sa sarili ko. Bakit nga ba ako nakikipagtawaran sa babaeng ito? Sa pagkakaalam ko, pumunta kami dito sa bar upang uminom ng kaunting cerveza, at magpalipas-oras. Nang umupo kami at umorder ng maiinom, nagsimulang lumapit ang mga babaeng nakatambay kanina sa may malapit sa pintuan. May ilang umupo sa tabi namin, nakipagkwentuhan.

Me llamo Sofia. Y tu?

Ahh. Hola Sofia. My name? I am Froi. Me llamo Froi. Sinusubukan kong hukayin sa pinakasulok ng utak ko ang mga salitang iyon.

Kahit na madalas ay hindi ko siya maintindihan, nakukuha ko pa ring maunawaan ang ilan sa mga salitang binibigkas niya.

Taga-Ecuador daw siya. Dalawampu't dalawang gulang. Napadpad at nanirahan dito sa Barcelona simula nang siya ay dalagita pa lamang. Mas mabuti daw ang buhay niya dito, mas maayos, kumpara sa pinagmulan niyang bansa. Marami pa siyang sinabi, at karamihan doon ay hindi ko maintindihan.

Lumipas ang ilang minuto at napagod na yata siya sa mga pambungad na kwento at salita. Dinampi niya ang kaniyang mainit na labi sa pisngi ko, at may ibinulong na mga katagang di ko maunawaan. Naramdaman ko din ang dahan-dahang paglapat ng didib niya sa braso ko.

“Sofia, what are you doing?”

“Que?”

Humagikhik siya. Tanong lang din ang sinagot niya sa tanong ko. Muli siyang nagsalita ng Espanyol, at napagtanto ko na iyon ay tungkol sa kung magkano ang presyo kung ikakama ko siya.

“Sige na Froi, ako na sasagot niyan kung isandaan lang,” si Fitter.

“Okay 'ter, kakausapin ko muna kung papayag.”

“Quanto Sofia?”

“Ciento cincuenta minimo, dos cientos maximo.”

“Uhm, no ciento cincuenta... how about cien? Then vamos?

“No, no. Ciento cincuenta minimo.”

“Ayaw 'ter, gusto talaga wanpipty.”

“Sige lang, kausapin mo lang yan at mapapapayag mo din yan.”

Muli kong hinarap si Sofia. Inaalok ng isandaan. Hindi pa rin siya pumapayag, kaya pinagmasdan ko na lamang ang natutunaw na yelo sa inumin ko habang patuloy niya akong sinusuyo sa gusto niyang mangyari.

Napansin siguro niya na natahimik ako kung kaya't lalo siyang lumapit sa akin. Sa pagkakataong ito, tinuturo niya ang kanyang pisngi at niyayang akong humalik sa kanya.

Magiging masyado naman akong antipako kung hindi ko iyon gagawin, kaya't dinampi ko ang labi ko sa pisngi niya. Sa paglapit kong iyon, hindi ko maiwasang mapuna ang amoy ng pabango niya. Pinasidhi niyaon ang pagnanasa kong muli siyang halikan. Maya-maya, may binulong siya sa akin.

“Vamos a cuentas.”

 

“What Sofia? Que?”

“Yo y tu...en la habitación.”

Pagkasabi niya noon ay agad na kinuha ang mga kamay ko at nilagay iyon sa dibdib niya. Ito ang pangalawang pagkakataon na nakahawak ako ng dibdib ng babae. Mabilog ang mga iyon, malambot. Nag-init ang pakiramdam ko. Parang may dumaloy na kuryente mula sa kamay ko patungo sa buong katawan ko.

“Bueno? Si?”

 “M-muy bien! muy bien Sofia. But I won't if it's one hundred fifty. I should be one hundred. Cien.”

Tinanggal niya ang mga kamay ko sa dibdib niya.

“No cien. Ciento cincuenta.”

Uminom ulit ako sa baso na nangangalahati na sa alak. Wala na. Hahaba lang ang usapan. Hindi rin naman papayag si Sofia sa gusto ko.

 Muli niya akong niyaya at tinuro ang madilim sa pasilyo sa isang sulok ng bar. Ngunit umiling lang ako. Maganda si Sofia, ngunit masyadong mahal. Nagtanong ulit siya kung gusto ko ngunit humindi na ako. Pumunta lang kami dito upang uminom.

Lumipas ang ilang minuto na tahimik ako. Napansin niya iyon at kusa na siyang lumayo at pumunta sa grupo ng iba pang mga babaeng naghihintay sa maalok na customer.  

Habang inuubos ang nalalabing alak sa baso ko, matama ko silang pinagmamasdan. Silang naguumpukan malapit sa may pintuan at patuloy na naghihintay sa kung sino ang maaaring bigyan ng panandaliang kaligayahan.

Sa grupong iyon pinako ko ang tingin ko kay Sofia. Katulad ng iba pa niyang kasama, nakangiti siya ngunit hindi tuwa ang makikita sa mga mata niya. Ang nakikita ko lamang sa kanya ay pagkainip, at pagnanais na umalis sa lugar na iyon.

Sa patuloy kong pagmamasid sa kanya, sa pag-iisip at pagtatanong sa sarili, bigla akong nakaramdam ng panlulumo.

 

Of Landlubbers, Shellbacks and Pollywogs Froi Dencio 09:23

 

''Be it known to all ye who enter my Realm,

that on this day this sailor was initiated

into the Solemn Mysteries of the Ancient Order of the Oceans

on board the ship Gigira Laitebo

...and in Latitude 00°00' and Longitude 137°40' East,

be it remembered by all ye Mermaids, Sea Serpents, Whales, 

Sharks, Dolphins, Skates, Eels, Lobsters, Crabs, Shrimps, Pollywogs,

Ice Worms, Passengers and Landlubbers...

...that when ye are honoured by his presence, 

ye shall treat him with the respect that is due to one of my Trusty Shellbacks

than which no respect is greater because by him and by his forefathers were many new,

Whereof nor you nor any of you may to the contrary

as ye answer at your peril."

                 

Neptunus Rex           

      We crossed the equator on April 7, 2015, and that was my first time. Who would think that an ancient tradition still exists on modern merchant vessels? The pictures below will show how the three newly joined crew members turned from slimy pollywogs to King Neptune's Trusty Shellback.

 

Everyone, look! Someone's coming!

Akala namin kung sino. Si Fairy godmoth...este si King Neptune pala.

 

Magbigay-pugay tayo sa hari ng karagatan! All hail King Neptune!

...and there the three pollywogs knelt.

With my magic wand...err, trident, I hereby command thee to perform the rituals.

And then King Neptune made us drink some sort of nasty liquid.

I will toss these coins into the pool. Bring these to me and prove that you are worthy of becoming my trusty Shellback.

At lumusong kami sa tubig, kinuha ang coins gamit lang ang bibig. Dun nauso ang sisid marino.

Sa kabilang dako, King Neptune's subjects were doing some photo shoot while we were having a hard time getting the coins.

Matapos ang ilang taon, nakuha rin namin ang coins at nagsimula na ang piging! De, papiktyur pala.

 

Kasabay din ng pagdiriwang na iyon ang paglusong ng lahat sa tubig.

 

At marami pang papiktyur sessions.

At last, I'm a full-pledged Shellback. Hawak ang aking certificate, nabilad ako sa araw. Mainit. Seryoso.

       

    

Welcome 2015 Froi Dencio 07:01

      Tapos na ang taong 2014. Sa Pilipinas ngayon, halos lahat siguro ng tao ay masayang sinalubong ang bagong taon. Samantalang ako, eto, ilang libong milya ang layo sa pamilya, nakaduty at nag-aabang ng mga fireworks( sakaling meron) sa pinakamalapit na lungsod sa amin, ang Dubai. Sa kasamaang-palad, lumipas na ang alas-dose ng gabi pero wala akong nakitang kahit ano, maliban sa ilang barkong naka-angkorahe sa paligid namin. Tahimik ang paligid sa labas, malayong-malayo sa ingay na likha ng mga kasamahan ko na sumalubong sa bagong taon. At eto na naman ako, nag-eemote sa labas, pagkatapos makainom ng ilang bote ng beer.

      Sa halip na maging malungkot at i-isolate ang sarili, mas minabuti ko na lang din na bumalik sa loob, magvideoke at uminom pa ng ilang bote ng beer. Hindi naman magandang simulan ang taon na nag-dadrama, baka mamaya, buong taon ding ng  pagdadrama ang mangyari sa akin.

      Ngayon iniisip ko kung papaano ko sisimulan ang taon. Magpaputok kaya? No. Hindi pwede, walang paputok. Saka bawal. Mangolekta ng labintatlong prutas? Hindi rin pwede, apat na  uri lang ng prutas ang meron kami ngayon sa barko: saging, melon, mansanas at ubas. Maghagis ng mga barya sa loob ng kwarto ko pagpatak ng alas-dose? Hindi rin pwede. Wala akong coins.

      Sa dami ng gusto kong gawin sa pagsalubong sa taong 2015, nauwi ang lahat sa pagharap ko sa laptop at paghahalungkat sa mga folder ng pictures ko sa mga pinagagagawa ko sa taong 2014. Kaya naisip ko na lang na i-review ang mga pangyayari sa loob ng isang taon gamit ang mga pictures na iyon.

 

Gala To Da Max. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang kinalaman ng mga nunal sa buhay at kapalaran ng tao pero natatawa talaga ako sa tuwing binabanggit ng mga kaibigan ko na kapag may nunal ka daw sa isang bahagi ng katawan mo, may kahulugan daw yun. Parang ako, kesyo me nunal daw ako sa paa kaya mahilig akong pumunta kung saan-saan. Nitong nakaraang taon, dahil nakabakasyon naman ako, sinimulan ko ang taon ng pagpunta sa mga lugar na hindi ko pa napupuntahan sa amin. Sinundan din iyon ng ilang biglaang excursion at roadtrip sa Luzon. Sana ngayong taon, makapunta naman ako sa Visayas o sa Mindanao.

Nasulit din ang bakasyon ko nitong nakaraang taon dahil sa mga lugar na napuntahan ko. Nagpagod sa Mt. Pulag, nakipag-paintball sa Pansol, at kumain ng wagas sa Villa Escudero.

Shore Leave. Sa halos siyam na buwan ng pananatili ko sa barko, isang beses lang ako nakalabas, at hindi ko pa na enjoy ng husto ang oportunidad na iyon. Ganunpaman, iba pa rin talaga ang makatapak ulit sa lupa. Namili lang ako ng ilang souvenir, napainom sa isang bar, at bumalik na uli sa barko kasama ang mga gintong alaala sa Barcelona.

Sa La Rambla. Ala-una na ng madaling-araw, nakuha pang pumosing ni Ka Dencio.

Mga Bagong Kaibigan. Hindi ko ini-expect na makakakilala ako ng mga tao maliban sa mga katrabaho ko. Naging daan ang blogosphere para makilala ko sila Yccos ng saturdaythoughts, Sepsep ng Alfabeto Della Mia Vita, Sir Rolf ng JOKENALISMO, at Lalah ng TELELALAHBELLS. Sana lang din at makita ko sila sa personal ngayong taon. At makilala ko pa ang iba pang interesanteng taong gumagala din sa blogosphere.

      Sa lugar ng naman ng trabaho, dalawa ang naging malapit kong kaibigan. Isang Romanian at isang Croatian. Pareho silang masigasig na nagtuturo sa akin tungkol sa mga teknikal na mga bagay sa pagbabarko. Maliban pa dun, si Sir Romanian ay nakaka-jam ko sa madaling araw kapag natapos na ang duty namin, samantalang si Sir Croatian naman ang nakakasama kong mag-gym sa tuwing sinisipag ako. Nakilala ko rin ang isang makulit na Chinese na si Wen, training officer sa barko namin.

Pakiramdam ko, matatapos man ako ng pagbabarko, maraming lahi na ng taong sa mundo ang magiging kaibigan ko.

Dramarama sa Taong 2014. Wala naman masyadong pag-eemote ang naganap sa akin sa taong ito, maliban sa pagkabasted ko noong January, sa nangyari sa Barcelona noong Nobyembre at ang pagnigalang-pugad ng kapatid ko nitong Disyembre. Noong 25 medyo naghuramentado lang ako sa natanggap kong balita sa pag-alis ng kapatid ko sa bahay namin upang sumama sa love of her life. Wala na akong magagawa sa naging desisyon niya at sa landas na pinili niya. Iniisip ko pa kung ano ang mabuting gawin kapag nakauwi na ako sa amin. Dahil ngayon, hindi ko pa rin maiwasan na makaramdam ng bigat sa dibdib.

Yearend Party, Dubai Fishing at iba pa. Sa unang pagkakataon, naranasan ko kung paano ipinagdiriwang sa barko ang Pasko at Bagong Taon. Darn. Wala naman palang espesyal. Sabi ng mga kasamahan ko, dumedepende daw ang pagiging masaya ng selebrasyon sa enthusiasm ng kapitan. Sa kaso namn, medyo anti-social ang kapitan namin ngayon na hindi man lang sumilip sa recreation room nang magsimula kaming magkantahan at mag-inuman. Natapos din naman kahit papaano ang dalawang selebrasyon, ang Pasko at ang pagsalubong sa Bagong Taon na kainan, inuman at tulugan lang ang ginawa namin.

Kagabi sagana pa sa lamesa. Kinaumagahan, wala nang natira.

      Kalahating buwan na rin pala kaming nakaangkorahe ng mga 30 kilometro mula sa Dubai. Kung kailan malapit na kaming umuwi, saka naman dumagsa ang mga trabahong dapat tapusin. Ganunpaman, nakuha pa rin naming sulitin ang panahon kapag wala na kaming trabaho. Ilan sa mga kasamahan ko ang nakahuli na ng malalaking lapu-lapu at barracuda. Nakahuli rin sila ng mga isda tulad ng snapper, matambaka, dorado at kanduli. Yung huling dalawang nabanggit ay madalas nilang itapon uli sa dagat. Ilang araw din kaming nakatikim ng fresh fish, na madalas sabawan ni second cook. Sa history naman ng pamimingwit ko dito, nakahuli naman ako kahit papaano ng tatlong isda, at hindi na iyon naulit pa.

Masaya rin pala ang makahuli ng isda. Mas masaya siguro ang makahuli ng dalaga.

Welcome 2015. Marami pang pangyayari sa 2014 na siguro magiging kabilang na lang sa baul ng alaala ko. Sa ngayon hinaharap ko ang bagong taon na puno ng pag-asa, optimism at paniniwala na makakaya kong harapin ang anumang pagsubok na darating. Inaasahan ko rin na sa taong ito, makakatagpo ako ng mga bagong kaibigan, at kung papalarin, makatagpo ng significant someone. Sawa na rin ako sa aking guni-guning sinta.

      Sinimulan ko na ang taon sa pamamagitan ng paglinis ng kwarto ko at paggawa ng schedule para sa bakasyon sa pag-uwi ko. Marami akong gustong gawin. Marami akong gustong matutunan. Kahit na hindi ako naniniwala sa mga new year’s resolution na di naman natutupad, sisikapin ko pa rin na maging masaya at mabunga sa taong ito. Higit sa lahat, bagaman hindi naging ganun kasaya ang pagtatapos ng taong 2014 para sa akin, nagpapasalamat pa rin ako sa Maykapal sa mga biyayang natanggap ko mula sa Kanya.

      Wala man akong paputok, labintatlong prutas o coins, nasalubong ko naman ang bagong taon na may kumpiyansa sa sarili at mga aral mula sa nagdaang taon. Malungkot ang malayo sa pamilya lalo na sa ganitong mga panahon, pero ang pagsasaisip na ang lahat ng ginagawa ko dito ay para sa kanila at para sa hinaharap ko ang nagsisilbing inspirasyon upang pagbutihin ko pa ang aking ginagawa.

      Sa ngayon nakikinikinita ko ang taong 2015. Bagong lugar, mga bagong mukha, bagong taong makikilala. Hindi ko lang kailangang i-overthink ang lahat. Sa tingin ko, what will happen will happen. Kailangan lang bigyan ng kaukulang panahon ang mga bagay-bagay. All I need to do, is to live life.

Manigong Bagong Taon!